Summing Up a Fantastic Year!

A soft clicking fills my ears as the clock's hands note the seconds passing by. My palms sweat as I stare at the bright screen on my desk. The cursor blinks in time with the clicking and nausea sweeps over me.

How on earth will I ever sum up 2009?

Visions of sandy beaches, ancient stone Temples, diving headfirst into crystalline cool water of a beautiful Cenote & impromptu Jimmy Buffet concerts in Cozumel;


The dark sand of the desert and cacti of Arizona, the laughter at Shannon Hale's witty introductions, the blur as I shake hands and talk writing with Stephenie Meyer, Brandon Mull, Jon S. Lewis, Janette Rallison, Chris Gall, PJ Haarsma, Laini Taylor, Shannon Hale, Dean Lorey & James Owen, the chills as I stand on stage with Stephenie Meyer and take home a precious prize;


The beauty captured in one of my favorite cities: D.C., running through a spy mission with my husband and laughing as I almost fall UP the stairs, understanding that certain places of historic value will always take my breath away, cruising the Potomac, meeting Chef Duff from Ace of Cakes;


The comfortable & familiar Pensacola Beach with its emerald water, white sandy beaches & moments with new family;


Days spent lounging in the sand or on the edge of a pool & devouring some amazing books;


Houston's flare for exemplifying why everything's bigger in Texas & a weekend with a bird trying to climb my skirt and one on Marcus' head;


Birthday celebrations with my favorite sister;


Summer concerts with Eric & Mindy - if it is within a quick driving distance then we were there!;


Summer fun at my parents pool, watermelon, lemonade, fried fish and celebrating the patriotism of the Fourth of July;


Panama City girls weekend to the Spa with my two most favorite girlfriends: my sister Nina & my mom, ALL day spa treatments - watching my mother discover the miracle that IS ALL DAY SPA TREATMENTS lol, the divine sensation of recognizing precious moments spent together;


Celebrating 10 years after graduating high school with my 30 classmates and realizing we are all still just as close as before, understanding the grueling planning it takes to set up a reunion but also acknowledging how much I love to be in control ;


Mickey, Donald, Goofy, Tinkerbell, & Stitch surround me with hugs, seeing my husband labeled as THAT GUY by my favorite Monster: Mike Wazowski, I marvel at sharing all my favorite things that are Disney with my nieces & nephews at my old Orlando stomping grounds;


Sitting down to dinner in a Catholic church that is now a brewery in the eclectic city of Pittsburgh while chuckling at a friend who decides to try his hand at a round of stiff Irish Stout and staring wide eyed at the stained glass windows that now sit above beer tanks;


Winning a blog contest by Janette Rallison that introduces me to some of the most wonderful people I could ever know;


NaNoWriMo and the nerves that accompany finally committing to one's dreams;


Hosting my first blog contest;


Being blessed by fellow writers/bloggers with their wonderful awards and smiling as I in turn get the joy of passing awards along;


Deciding that writing should no longer be a goal that I push away, but one that I embrace with all my heart;


Learning what YouTube & Blog Wars are;


Marveling at being the subject of not one, but TWO Vlog entries on two awesome blogs! (Frankie & the Story Siren);


Weekend football games as the Crimson played a perfect season from opening in Atlanta to closing in Atlanta;


Learning to Tweet;


Discovering yet again, every day how blessed I am to have such an amazing husband, family, friends & dog (Peanut Butter Barr ;o) );


Thanksgiving shared with friends from St. Louis and the cutest curly haired little girl;


Loving the fact that my mother wanted an iPod for Christmas!;


Christmas with all its sparkle never disappoints;


Lists of resolutions for what only promises to be a sensational year...


All these things. All these wonderful moments in my life are more than I could ever dream of yet I still dream. I still have my sights set on goals, I still have my hopes pinned to letters on a keyboard, I still embrace all that the journey encompasses.


I live for these moments. I am stronger for the obstacles that fell in between each thing listed above as well as for meeting these amazing things with open heart & smiling face. Opportunities are everywhere and for years I just watched as they slipped by.

2009 reminded me to embrace life.

Welcome 2010 and all that you have to offer - may I make you proud.

2008: Strength

New Years Eve.
Wow. 2008 is at its precipice. My 27th year around the sun is coming to a quick close. I normally don't do the resolution thing, at least not in writing (seems too binding :) )but this year I find myself being more retrospective than usual.
Back at Thanksgiving I created a blessings list. It had all the usual suspects: husband, dog, family, friends, health, technology (hey it gives me a blog), fashion, etc. These things are ever present each day. When I look back at that list & I think about how each of them was able to touch 2008 for me at least once and on most occasions at least twice; I find that this past year my theme was strength. Every year I notice a theme. One that rolls through my moods, my decisions, my ideas and this year was no exception.
So strength was my theme. At the beginning of last year I never would have imagined all the exciting & terrifying things that came my way.
I found a new obsession -Twilight - it gave me strength in that Stephenie inspired me to forget what others think of your work, just create for yourself, actually it inspired me to just: CREATE. No matter how, just do it. (thank you Nike for that inspiring slogan that will forever swoosh through time).
In March I found myself in my parents back yard lying on a hammock and just letting go of all the gloom. I had been so depressed, winter blues to the maximum, and so I took a trip to Camden. A familiar surrounding of memories enveloped me & I found strength. This instance taught me that going home again is sometimes all you need. It did not fix everything but it gave me the strength to say "Okay, Courtney, what is going on and how can we work on this?"
In June it seems that I was surrounded by the theme. All of the Twilight women I had 'talked' to online became faces I now know. Luncheons & giggling with other women over a common new love was a blast. Seeing these women of all colors, shapes, sizes, ages, and ideals come together as friends was beautiful. The word strength does not even begin to express what they all do for life in general. I am most lucky that Twilight also created a new bond with my sister & mother, it opened a door that any daughter/sister would love to explore. I am so very lucky.
June also provided me with the admiration of my sister. Nina worked hard to get her certification for Jazzercise. She pushed herself, she worked, she loved every moment that got her to be an instructor. It was a road well traveled and in it I watched strength grow in more ways than just upper & lower body. I saw a confidence that I had not seen in my sister for years.
July - wow - I cannot believe that July even occurred. Here is where God decided that my theme needed to be tested on the individual not on those around me for examples. I will never forget sitting on a makeshift hospital bed crying my eyes out because of pain, then because of fear. I looked at a woman who I truly thought could not be over 35 (who is in fact 40) as she held my hand and told me the scariest 5 scenarios I have ever heard. I watched my husband sit silently and shocked beside me not wanting to call anyone due to being scared he would not be able to tell them what she told us. Then a week later I found a whole new scenario. I was still scared but I will never forget the peace & strength I discovered sitting on another hospital gurney waiting for a surgeon and listening to an anesthesiologist tell me to be calm and he would be right there with me through it all. Strength helped me through 8 more weeks of recovery, pain, and self discovery.
Then at the end of my own personal crisis one of my best friends had to dig for her strength. From Alabama I could only read blogs, talk on the phone & pray as Tracy, Mike, & Isabel walked a path that no parent or sibling should ever have to travel. Yet Brooklyn brought a new kind of strength. I watched a friend, a sister, go through life's hardest trial and come out with a faith & strength unlike anything I have ever seen. Sitting on a bed listening to the story of those last moments with her daughter made my soul even stronger and listening to Brooklyn's sister matter of factly tell us that Brooklyn was in the box made my heart swell. Isabel can still see that beautiful sister of hers in the room, outside, everywhere and the faith that she is watching over us all gave me a new strength in a faith that I already believed.
The fall wore into winter and football season was a joy. Seeing those kids play with real heart was amazing. Then the holidays... oh the holidays. Family always gives me strength. The love of my siblings, my parents, my friends - they are wonderful.
Through this whole year from the beginning to this day my common thread of strength was possible thanks to God and his angels. My outstanding, wonderful, crazy, hilarious husband has been my pillar. He has shown strength when I found myself crumbling and I am happy to say that there have been days where my newfound strength has been able to help him, to ease some of his stress. So 2009 looms ahead of me... what theme will be found here on December 31, 2009? I don't know, I don't mind not knowing. the journey of a year is priceless. So to all of you I wish you a marvelous new year, may your theme be one that makes you think, makes you evaluate, makes you cry, terrifies you, enlightens you, but most of all may it make you laugh, make you appreciate, and make you realize that each year itself is a blessing beyond all others! Happy New Year!